Category: Just like that

Get Milk

D’s trip to a grocery store follows a general pattern –

Me: Can you head to the grocery store? We really need to and I am stuck with xyz right now.
D: Sure, can you make me a cup of tea before I leave?
Me: !!!!
D: OK OK, what do we need to get?
Me: *rattle out a list of things which are everyday grocery list for me* Onions, tomatoes, ginger, garlic, green chilies, eggs, milk..
D: What? I can’t remember all that! Can you write it down for me?
Me: *rather than argue, I quickly find a paper and pen and write it all down*

20 minutes later the phone rings.

D: I lost the list. I kept it in my pocket but can’t find it. Can you tell me what all I need to get?
Me: *goes over things again*
D: Wait, I can’t remember all this. Let me grab things from the veggi section and call you back!
Me: !!!!

Call after 5 mins

D: Do we need Penuts?
Me: No
D: How about juice?
Me: No
D: Oh oh I see yogurt?
Me: No! we make our own. Can you please stick to the list?

2 or 3 calls later, what is required is bought and paid for and I get a message saying, “Done, heading home!”

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All this is of course when he is going to the grocery store from home. Then there are times when I tell him to get something on his way from work.

6:15 P.M.
Me:  Can you get so and so on your way from work?
D: Sure!
Me: What time are you leaving?
D: 15 mins

6:40 P.M.
Me: Have you left yet?
D: Got stuck. Leaving in 5

7:00 P.M.
D: On my way
Me: Don’t forget to get so and so
D: Yeah!

7:30 P.M.
Garage door opens. The kids run down to greet him. There is general cheer everywhere. And it all comes to a stand still as soon as he sees my face.
D: Oh no! I forgot. I will go now and get it.
Me: Never mind! We will make do without it for today.

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I was out for a run when a car caught my eye. It had something written on the driver side windshield. As it came closer, I looked closely. In bold letters, with a red sharpie, it read – GET MILK!

I had to stop to take in the brilliance of it! It was practical and funny and perfect, all at the same time. Try and forget that one, dear husbands!

 

 

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If you ever visit the Comfy household..

..and find some of your personal belongings missing please look in the trashcan. Bugz – The cleaner, thinks that the trash is the rightful place for every single thing and is seen dumping random things there. Now what you pick out of the trashcan is based on the value of the said thing, its value to you and your hygiene tolerance level.

..please keep your undergarments under a lock and key unless you want Bugz to use them as accessories to be worn around the neck and on the head.

..understand the meaning behind every ‘enh’ ’cause you better not come running to me when a full on drama commences.

..smile from afar if you want smiles in return. Coming close only gets you suspicious looks in return.

..get dressed to go out of the house if you want Bugz to come to you, because she will go to anyone as long as she gets to go outside.

..don’t forget to bring earplugs along if you value your eardrums even a little bit.

..please don’t for anything and I mean ANYTHING (even refills) take Bugz sippy cup away from her. Now if you are the one to hand a missing sippy cup back to her, be ready to be dazzled with a smile wide and shiny eyes.

So anyone coming?

Secret Tot Society – Rules

1. When one kid cries the other has to milaao taal se taal and cry along – after all there is strength in unity.

2. When Mom is feeding one kid, the other has to make sure that s/he poops – that is the only way to help each other looking half-starved and mom feeling guilty forever.

3. When one kid sleeps the other has to be up and rocking – else mom would get some rest and that is not allowed.

4. When Mom is eating one or the other kid has to get in to some kind of mess and come to her crying – which means we move to rule 1. Which in turn means the food is forgotten for a good half an hour till the kids are calm. Then we come back to rule 4 all over again.

5. Mom’s lap should never be left empty – always keep one eye on her and the minute she sets one kid down, the other should be there to be picked up.

6. If tiredness takes over both the kids at the same time and both are asleep and mom thinks to catch some shuteye, send thought waves out to the world at large so that the phone or the door bell rings.

7. Should Mom act smart and take a bath, throw up on her the minute she steps out – after all the default perfume for her is called ‘The Stink’.

Currently we are..

Enamored with our A mama – we talk about him non-stop when he is not there. We talk with him non-stop when he is.

Fascinated with cows, dogs, horses – and the fact that all we need to do is step out of the house to see them.

Learning the joys of home-made butter – nothing we eat these days is complete without a dollop of the same.

Confused about the endless Nanas and Nanis – some new Nana or/and Nani come every single day to meet us. We can’t seem to keep a track of them all.

Angry with mosquitoes – they gave us aaoovvii in five different places in a matter of 10 minutes, one of them on our eyelid. Our right eye is currently swollen shut.

Pretending to talk to our Paa – all the time but for when Paa calls. Then we get too excited to say more than ‘Hi Papa’.

Enjoying bath time – with a bucket and a tumbler and all the water that gets splashed around.

Playing hide and seek – with sheet and blankets that are hung for drying. The cool, wet, clean sheets are so much fun to hide inside, so what if our legs are visible at all times.

Unsure about tu, tum, aap – so we use whatever we feel like at any give moment. So we speak like ‘Nana kya kar rahe ho tu’.

Waking up at 4:00 in the morning – just because Maa is up taking care of the little one. We greet the day with a huge smile on our face and start jumping right from get go. So what if Maa wants to sleep and keeps telling us it is not time to get up yet. And no it is not because of jetlag.

Excited about sleeping – next to Maa. Hence the waking up early.

Upset about our A mama – not being in town for the next couple of weeks.

Of Airports

We were sitting in the McDonald’s at Frankfurt airport. Not because of the food but because one complete wall of it was glass and faced the runway. Airplanes taking off and landing was the only thing that was keeping Buzz entertained during the 5+ hour transit time.

Suddenly D pointed out,

Look at that, even their luggage carrying trailers are Mercedes.

Sure enough every single ground control vehicle was a Merc. Now in my mind Mercedes is one of the ultimate in high-end luxury cars and to see grease covered trucks and dirty trailers at the airport from that brand was a shock to begin with. D probably felt the same way which is why he pointed it out. After we got over the shock, overload of Merc at Frankfurt airport made sense of course. German company vehicles used at the Germany International Airport.

After which the talk moved on to making guesses on what vehicle manufacturer some of the other countries used. Having never paid any attention to them anywhere before we guessed it was probably Ford in the US and Toyota in Japan. India – Maruti?

Can anyone guess or remember what India uses?

We landed in India and the answer was in front of us. And to be honest, I loved it over any other country. In India we use ‘Mahindra and Mahindra’ bright red tractors. I could not stop the grin on my face when I first saw them. To my mind if was just so perfect, so India.

Have you noticed the make of ground transport used at any of the international airports, if so please share so that we all know a little bit more.

On a side note: Have you seen the Delhi (Indira Gandhi) International Airport? If yes, is it not just amazing. If not, you should. You so should. It hands down has to be the best airport I have ever been to. So what if a milkshake there costs Rs. 700 (no kidding, it was a Häagen-Dazs shop) and I just can’t get myself to spend that much money on a milkshake, the airport is out of this world. Loved it.

Landmines

They are everywhere. Show up unexpectedly. Never sure how much damage they will cause. Caution is futile. Resistance useless.

– I turn the corner in a hurry and stumble on one.

– Sleep muddled I get off from the bed in response to a cry for ‘Mumma’ and nearly fall to my knees.

– I get ready to take a shower, take a quick peek to ensure it is a safe zone, turn around to get some things in place and in less than a minute step in to take a shower and my feet lands on one.

– A quick run downstairs at night to get water from the kitchen and suddenly lights start to blink and gleeful noise screams ‘Hi this is the lion calling. Call me’.

They come in all shapes – square, star, circle, animal, phone, books

They come in all materials – wood, plastic, rubber, foam

They come in all sizes – x-small, small, medium, large, x-large

They come in all colors – pink, green, blue, yellow, orange, purple

They come in all decibels levels – mute, squeak, normal, loud, eardrum shattering

But most importantly they come to bodily harm you, make you fall on your knees, give your heart a start, make you hobble, drive you out of your mind.

And no, no matter what you do and how many times you clean up and how careful you are and how many times you check and double check, somehow someway they find a way to the wrong place at the wrong time, all thanks to a little hurricane and her ability to hide them in places unknown to mere parents.

These landmines or toys as the marketing people love to call them are pure evil and I hate them.

Oh and to the person who gave her the wooden blocks and 28 of them at that: Why? What wrong did we ever do to you? Do you know how many stubbed toes and hurt nails and almost falls I have owing to those menacing little things? 😐

Brilliant Business Idea

Week before last saw me reading quite a few cards as friends showed me what they bought. This Monday saw me reading a few more, as they showed off what they got. Over time I have come to realize that I am a card snob. There are very very few cards that I really like. For the rest, I just kind of make do with whatever is in the store. As I scrunched my nose (mentallyof course), I got thinking. I read a lot (of blogs) on a daily basis and love so much of what I read. Between us, we cover all the various emotions. So why not start a card business. We have such good writing and there are so many creative people. We can write something funny, something thoughtful, something mad, something mushy. We will be a hit, I tell you and will mint (not yours Pepper. That one won’t multiply unless you do something about it) so much money from everyday things we write anyways. 

So what say blog people?

Bloggers of the world unite, have nothing to lose but their debts.

Don’t sue me Karl Marx.

Once the idea took place, I went and did some research (in all the years I have worked, I have come to realize that you have to show a working prototype to convince people. SIGH!! People don’t see brilliance right in front of them, till they see visual proof) and came up with some card categories curtsy our blogger friends.

What is a card company without a Birthday Card? But if the card is funny and happy and edible to boot, who can resist it? Miss Smart Ass calls herself a smartass for a reason after all.

 

A ‘Miss You’ card is of no use if it does not make the recipient of the card not yearn to head back. Who better to make anyone feel ‘the angst of missing a loved one and painting the picture of joy of having you around’ than our very own T?

Then there is the quintessential I-am-so-in-love-marry-me! section in every store. Have you ever noticed how boring they are? Would a girl ever fall for crap like that? So a card by our resident expert in asking the tough questions, a girl’s point of view on how to propose, Rev.

LOVE. Four letter word. Over used like none other, especially in the week past. We seriously need people to write about it without making all of us diabetic. Enter Miss Rays. Love and all the perfect words that go with it, per jara hut ke.

Now a card store just HAS to cater to all the various holidays. How else would they make money? Can you seriously think of anyone better to get in to the spirit of things better than our witchy, madcap, make them laugh till they drop, Sakshi? Come come have a look. This one has Halloween written all over it.

Sorrow, sadness, hurt – the flip side of life. None of us can outrun this. Hope is what makes us carry on through all the black times. Can you find better words to give the much-needed encouragement than the ones, the ever thoughtful, Dew came up with?

Welcoming people back with cards and gifts is common, but a simple ‘you were missed’ is just so blah. Spicing it up and still being honest about it, is Happy Feet. Perfect is the word.

There is so much hoopla about the New Year. So much money gets spent. So many cards bought and sold. But someone has to give it as it is and still make you look forward to it all. Steps in the Nut. Asks the questions that need to be asked and still wishes you happy.

Ever card store needs to have their mark, their own special something. Pepper comes up with that special tadka. ‘Special offer’ cards for all occasions and no occasions at all. Earn point and redeem them as you go. A better offer you will not find. And oh what a way to spice up your otherwise boring life.

There are always things we are thankful about in life. But sometimes we all need a reminder of the little things, when we are down and out. Scribbler gives her special touch to make you count your blessings and smile as you go. A perfect gift for someone, who needs to look beyond the clouds and see the sunshine.

Aah..and how can we not have a card store without a section for Hindi cards. Whispering Moonz enters ever so gracefully with her thoughtful and amazing words. Who can help not be moved by them.

And the good news is that this is not the end. There is a need for that perfect picture to go behind all the words written. Enter Wordless Wednesdays (Swaram, T, Bikram, Smitha, Uma). And what is a card store without e-cards. And what are e-cards without some amazing graphics, Tanishka are you listening?

If you think this is it. Let me tell you the grand expansion plans. Once we have this part of the business going, we can start of a food cafe in the store corner. We have so many amazing cooks in the blog world after all. Uma with her South India food, Sags with her kheer, Pal with her quick to make train dosa, CB with her amazing cakes.

We can rule the world people. Brilliant am I not? So what say, let’s get on with it. But before we do, come on tell me what do we name our business?