Month: March 2013

Technology, please help!

What I currently do as I cook, clean, give the kids a bath, put them to sleep is scream ‘No’ in various degree of urgency. No matter what I am doing, I am constantly tuned in to sounds around the house and turning to look where both the kids are. Slightly charred Rotis are a small price to pay when it comes to keeping them away from being hurt and the endless drama that follows.

What I need is a device that watches the kids like a hawk in every corner of the house, figure out that they are doing something they are not supposed to and call out in my voice, ‘No *insert kid’s name here’. It would also be nice if it could figure out what decibel the said no should be sounded in to make the most impact.

What I did yesterday, because I had to reply to a very important email, was keep saying ‘No’ every now and then and sometimes add a kids name randomly.  Worked out well for a bit till, luck of draw or call it whatever, I happen to call out, ‘No Buzz’, in bit of a shriek. Footsteps running, she came to a halt next to me and asked,

What did I do this time Mumma?
err..nothing baby! Mumma got scared that you were hurt.
Don’t scream at me for no reason, Mumma or I will tell Papa when he comes home!

Sigh!!!

What I think I should do for now is record one word, ‘No’, followed it with a pause of 3 or so seconds  and play it in a loop endlessly (past experience teaches me that adding a kids name can land me in more trouble so skip that) , till the time technology catches on with my needs.

Where is ‘an app for that’ when you really need it?

Cold

The Comfy household is fighting the Cold virus these days and when I say fighting, I mean trying really hard not to catch it from each other.

One day last week, Buzz came home with a case of sniffles. I feared runny nose, fever, severe congestion but she was mostly fine throughout the day. It was only as she lay down at night when she would go in to bouts of coughing. Head/Chest high, medicine, Vicks – we did the works but she coughed till she settled down for the night.

Buzz: Cough cough cough
Bugz (lying face down in her crib in the same room): Khoo Khoo

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Buzz got all better in a couple of days which meant she asked for and was refused her cough medicine. Bugz on the other hand had caught the bug and was actually coughing.

Bugz: Cough cough cough
Buzz (hand on her face): Khoo khoo! Dekho Mumma mujhe bhi khansi hei, dawaayi chahiye! (Mumma, see I am coughing, I need my medicine!)

Only after I told her that Bugz would not get any medicine for her cough since she was too little did the mock cough stop.

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This morning D, fearing the worst, was heard gargling in the bathroom upstairs.

Bugz: grr grr grr.. oooo!
grr grr grr.. oooo!
grr grr grr.. oooo!

Buzz soon followed, as the two of them made their way upstairs.

Gargles forgotten D was heard laughing hard.

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PS: For anyone who cares about me, I am still fighting to the best of my ability

Sharing

Phone conversation

D: I am thinking of stopping by the Indian Store on my way back home. Feel like eating Samosas. How many do I get for you?
Me: Don’t want any. *with thoughts of weight loss running in high gear through my head* Just get one for Buzz.
D: Yeah Buzz has already placed her order and is all excited about it. You sure you don’t want any?
Me: Yeah!

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I was putting Bugz to sleep when these two entered the house. Buzz’s excited voice could not be missed. There was a little fight over when to wash hands, before or after eating. D quietly but firmly said, ‘both’.

I came down after Bugz was asleep to find D finishing the last of his Samosa and Buzz busy eating hers.

Me: You really did not get any for me? *puppy dog face*
D: You were the one who so adamantly said you did not want any! *horrified*
Me: No one loves me. Sob Sob! *full on drama*
Buzz: Mumma, I love you so much!

Finishes off the last of the hard shell of the samosa, leaving all the potatoes (which she NEVER eats) and hands her plate to me.

Buzz: I will share my samosa with you.
Me: errrrrr!!

Through their eyes

– In the land of straight straight haired people, Bugz with her head full of ringlets that fall in every which direction was an instant celebrity. #WhyIsMaaTryingToFindWaysToTameTheMess#

– Bugz, who has ordained that Maa is the only one who can pick her up and that her feet shall never touch the ground (two of which combined means Maa’s back and shoulder are giving away completely), let go of the first part and was seen getting her pictures clicked with the hordes that lined up for the honor. #WhereAreThesePeopleWhenMaaNeedABreak# #NightmaresOfParanoidMaa#

– In the land of super well-dressed people with designer clothes and immaculate makeup, Buzz turned to me and asked, ‘Unhoin ne apne eyes pe pain kyoin kiya hei, Mumma?’ (Why have they put paint on their eyes, Mumma?) #ThisIsWhatHappensWhenMaaDoesNotOwnSoCalledPaint#

– Buzz, who would be quite a fashionista if not for evil Maa, looked at women in 4+ inch heels on the airplane and asked, ‘Aap ne to kahaa tha plane mein party shoes nahien pehan sakte!’ (You said we can’t wear our party shoes in the airplane!) *insert accusing look* #SoMuchForTryingToKeepHerComfortable#

– In the land of bright sun, water, sand, not a cloud in the sky, Bugz refused to stop crying and get off the floor to step outdoors till she had her bulky jacket on. #PerksOfKidsGrowingUpInColdPlaces#

– Buzz, who was every ready to step out with her sand toys, played endlessly in the sand but was seen screaming and running away the minute she spied a wave coming her way. She stepped in the water on her own on the very last day. #BeachIsForTheSandNotWaterYouDodo# #ThereIsASwimmingPoolForThat#

– In the land of fresh juices galore, Buzz figured out real quick that asking for juice was OK every time we went out for a meal. ‘Aaj kon sa juice peyenge Mumma?’ (Which juice will we have today, Mumma?), she would asked as soon as we were seated. #DeprivedKids# #EvilMom#

– Bugz, the smart one, fought for every straw on the table. #WhoNeedFoodOrDrinksWhenYouHaveStrawsToChewOn#

– In the land where communication was very difficult because of language issues, Bugz made herself understood completely using her expanded vocabulary of ‘enh’, ‘aaeesht’, ‘duttttsss’ and pointing her fingers. #SeeSheGetsOnJustFineWithoutWords#

– Buzz figured out food options in grocery stores while Maa and Paa struggled with their inability to read food labels. #WhereDidWeLoseOurAssociationOnSightAndStartRelyingSoHeavilyOnWhatWeRead#

From the first part of (not so) recent trip