Month: November 2012

Me, Myself and I

I stood in front of my wardrobe and could not find one thing I was happy wearing. There were old worn out T-shirts, a few button down shirts, a handful of sweaters and my beat up pair of jeans.

First there was the get fit drive I was on, then came the *let’s try and have a baby* phase, which was followed by buying a few maternity clothes for obvious reasons, the trying to lose baby weight and gloating in being able to fit in to pre-maternity clothes, getting pregnant again (and reusing clothes from the last time), trying to lose weight again and realizing that it ain’t gonna happen, all came in order. In all of this the ever practical side refused clothes shopping for years at end.

A look at my wardrobe almost had me in tears. In between taking care of the kids, my job, the house – I had let a part of myself go. I think I did (and still do) an OK to decent job at it all as I put all my time and energy in taking care of things. What I forgot to take the time out for was myself or was too tired to do anything about it. Clothes were just a trigger.

I spent the next couple of months re-building my wardrobe. Old clothes, that I did not want to wear anymore, were kept aside, drawers were cleaned, new things were bought, closet was organized. I smile every morning now as I see hues of blue and green and orange and purple and yellow and red peep at me as I open the doors of my closet.

Shoes were my first love. Growing up there were three pair of shoes that were bought every year – a black one and a white one for school and a pair for social outings. I used to look and carefully pick the social outing one. That was the special pair after all.

I used to look forward to growing up and getting to wear heels but as I grew up and gained my full height they became a no-no. Not because I did not want them but because I had friends who were not as tall and they would refuse to walk next to me if I wore heels. I lived my college days in jootis (that I love them is beside the point here) while all my friends wore heels.

Side Note: The first thing I bought when I started my wedding shopping was a pair of heels. Aah, the joys of having a partner who is tall!

Being pregnant and running after kids changed the game again. Flats were in order, stupid practical side rearing its head again. I would look wishfully at women around me wearing beautiful shoes and would think to myself ‘If only they did not have heels’. Winter season coming along did not help one bit, the various beautiful boots and booties even more so. Sigh!

I was out this weekend with the kids to a store to buy a few things for them when I crossed their shoe section. There was this pair of booties that caught my eyes. As a shoe lover, I have to say, they were beautiful. I stopped in my tracks.

‘Heels’, the practical side said.
‘Oh, live a little’, the evil side said.

Buzz was running in one direction exploring things. Bugz wanted to be picked up. As I scrambled to catch hold of Buzz and tried to reason with Bugz to keep sitting in the stroller, I grabbed a box for my size and ran along to finish the shopping I was there for.

Just the thought of the booties sitting downstairs waiting for me has kept me smiling since. Today I took them out of their box and wore them to work. And it hit me, THE HEELS. It has been forever since I wore any and these are not the 3″ ones that I can wear comfortably. They do look real good though.

‘Return them’, the practical side says.
‘Oh give them a shot, you will get used to them’, the evil side says.
‘Keep them for special occasions. Plus you still are shorted than me so who cares’, smiling D says.

I will indulge, me thinks.
A little something for Me.
Continuing the thought of doing things for Myself.
Remembering there is more to it, the bit called I.

Chicken and Egg Problem

Hum dahi ke saath dudu nahein peete. (We don’t drink milk with yogurt.)
Nahein. (No.)
Kyoin? (Why?)
Dahi dudu se banti hei na, isliye. (Because yogurt is made of milk.)
Dudu kahaan se aata hai? (Where does milk come from?)
Cow deti hei humein. (Cow gives it to us.)
Aur egg kahaan se aate hain? (And were does egg comes from?)
Chicken se. (From chicken.)
Aur chicken egg khati hain. (And chicken eats eggs.)
Eggs ko phod ke kaate hain na? (They crack the eggs and eat them, right?)

Twist on the classic problem, Buzz style.

Creative teachings

I love the sound track of ‘Sound of music’ and figured I should pass it along to the kids. I started by singing ‘Do Re Mi’ to them. Buzz caugth on quick.

Me: Do
Buzz: A deer, a female deer
Me: Re
Buzz: A drop of golden sun
Me: Mi
Buzz: A name I call myself
Me: And that will bring us back to
Buzz: Do ooooo. Do – a deer, a female deer.


I have always wanted music to be a part of the kids life which means our house is constantly filled with music. Hindi, English, Punjabi, instrumental and assorted music from around the world that we like. If nothing else I sing to them in my toneless voice and we dance around.

Sometime last year while singing a popular Hindi song I changed some (errr almost all) of the lyrics to add Buzz and Bugz name in it. The tune stayed the same. Buzz, too little to understand that it was a made up song, was overjoyed to find a song with Bugz and her name in it and constantly asked me to sing it to her. Hence started

O Bugz Bugz Bugz, O kitni pyaari pyaari Bugz, O Buzz aur Bugz, O Buzz aur Bugz milli.

sung to the tune of ‘O uddi uddi uddi’ from the movie ‘Saathiya’. Since then a lot of songs have been changed to include their names, much to Buzz’s amusement.


Overheard this morning:

Do – a deer, a female deer. Re – A drop of golden Bugz.

Such a proud Mommy moment for me! I have passed on my creative genius on to the next generation.

Two worlds collide

Bugz loves to be held, cuddled and carried around – a total contrast to Buzz.

Bugz refuses to let anyone hold her hand as she walks – a total contrast to Buzz.

A couple of weeks back while D and I were taking care of early morning chores, before we left for work, we heard Bugz give out a happy laugh. We looked to see Buzz holding Bugz hand and the two of them walking around the living room. This has since become their morning schedule. They are seen walking hand in hand, laughing every now and then, as we get ready in the morning.


When Buzz was a few weeks short of her first birthday, on a sunny day, we had gone to a lake nearby. While D and I collected things to carry with us, Maa and Paa held one of Buzz’s hand each and started walking. Little Buzz walking between her Nana and Nani and they protecting her from every bad (real or perceived) around. That picture of the three of them walking is one of my favorite pictures of baby Buzz.


This past weekend I took both the kids grocery shopping with me. After parking the car and getting the kids out, I decided to see if I could make Bugz walk till the store rather than carry her. Buzz held Bugz hand on one side and me on the other. Surprise of surprise she did not pull her hand out of either of our grasps even once. We crossed the parking lot and just before the glass door opened I saw the image we made. For that split second I saw a world that is long gone, a world that is never coming back.


The same evening D and I took the kids out to play. Again in the parking lot Buzz held Bugz hand on one side D on the other while I held Buzz’s other hand. The four of us walked together and suddenly a new image got added to my mental album. The image of us – the family.