Ray of sunshine

Dear Buzz,

You are too little to know what a trouper you have been and how much you have helped us all through everything else that has been going on. Or maybe because you are so little and are blissfully unaware that you stay true to yourself and make us all smile through the tears.

Your enthusiasm for air-pains carried us through the horrors of horrendous routing, missed connections, added connections to the itinerary and multiple days of traveling. You figured out quickly that the food cart always had orange juice. You would patiently wait for the air-hostess to come to our seat and then promptly ask for orange juice before either your Paa or I could get a word out. Which caused everyone around to break in to smiles. You were forever looking out the window pointing out to the wings and engine and the clouds and land below and then say ‘air-pain uper, shooom’. Through spoilt milk and food you were not interested in, through confined seating and limited activities, through irregular timings and frequent waking up from your sleep, you kept going, not really ever complaining or causing too much trouble for us. And still are as fascinated with air-pain as you were before we did the 7 planes travel in less than a two week timeframe.

You were bored, confined inside the house owing to the severe heat and were still seen dancing to all the dinchak bollywood songs. The songs, colors, dancing seem to fascinate you no end. You invented your own game where the bed frame was a barn where imaginary cows, horses and pigs stayed. You played with them, moving them around, putting them to sleep and generally jumping around for hours. Your excitement at seeing a cow or a dog or a horse on the street had everyone excited about finding them for you. Your one outing for the day used to be to the hospital where you were only allowed to the door of the ICU. And you were seen running to the door every few minutes, putting your nose to the door, peeping in and saying ‘Nani theek ho jaao’. And the four little words melted all our hearts every single time.

Your Hindi English mixed language was a great source of amusement to everyone around. The time I picked up a cloth to clean up some mess and you heard me say, ‘mein saaf karti huin’ and you followed suit by picking up a cloth and saying, ‘I saafing’ in place of your standard, ‘I cleaning’ cracked us all up. Every time you said, ‘I suck’ in place of ‘I am stuck’ there were laughs and smiles all around.

I look back at the month that it has been and you stand out the one person who made a lot of us smile, who made us all forget even for a little while what was going on around us. I guess you did see me cry a couple of times and the sheer distress on your face had me wiping my tears away. But since then you have been extra generous with your hugs and cling to me much more. Your warmth helps when most other things don’t. My heart stops for a heartbeat every time you ask for Nani when we call home, I am extra impatient with your tantrums, I don’t do as much with you anymore, so I wanted to let you know that you give me reasons to smile, get angry, get upset, laugh, live every single day. You are my personal sunshine in the gray clouds that surrounds me. I am so blessed to have you.

Stay healthy, stay happy, stay you sweetheart. Always!

Love you loads,

20 thoughts on “Ray of sunshine

  1. Buzz is such a sweetheart and I am sure she helped you getting some sanity, its tough to loose your loved ones. Hugs dear..stay calm ..Buzz Hinglish is so sweet..please give her kisses from me please..

  2. Thanks a ton for this post Comfy! I mean it.

    Had many questions about how Buzz handled all the travel + the situations during your stay..did she see you in tears?

    I am so relieved that was always her cheerful self – spreading nothing but unadulterated love and smile all around. They are the best of medicines to make us forget all pains 🙂

    My heartiest of hugs to the little Diva – Love you So Much Buzzie Baby!

  3. God bless you all.
    Beautiful post Comfy. I kept thinking of how Buzz had witnessed all the things happening at home, wondered if it was all too much for her. But there she is, my own lil Hero.

    Take care dear.

  4. This is such a beautiful ode to your daughter. Buzz is a darling and this is the thing with girls…they are are blessing really. Glad she was your strength and I hope you’re healing well.

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